Families waiting to be matched with children are fully screened, loving, prepared and eager to adopt. Some have specific preferences, such as they would like to adopt a girl rather than a boy. Some have children already, through adoption or biologically, and some are childless or infertile. Some are married couples and others are unmarried.
We do not rule out families because the matching decision belongs to the birthmother and father. We do not discriminate against prospective adoptive families on the basis of race, sex, marital status, religion, age, sexual orientation, veteran status or disability, in so far as the disability does not incapacitate a person from parenting.
ABC Infant Adoption is a pro-choice adoption agency. Obviously, we help birthparents make adoption plans. But there is no pressure for birthparents to choose adoption.
We have found that both married couples and single persons are excellent adoptive parents. What is most important is twofold: first, that the birthmother and that their baby will be loved and cherished and, second, that the child will have opportunities to identify with adults within the family or close friends. It is very important that children have positive role models.
If you were the only white child in a black community or the only black child in a white community, you would certainly notice and feel “different.” Families who adopt cross-racially or cross-ethnically must be committed to ensuring that the child will have opportunity for healthy role identification. So, too, it is important that single mothers have close family members or friends who can serve as father figures or and that single fathers have close family members or friends who can serve as mother figures.
After considering one or two or three adoptive families, birthmothers are sometimes surprised by their own decision. We try our best to present the closest match. However, it is not unusual for a birthmother who requests a family without children to end up preferring a family with children; or, for a birthmother who prefers a married couple to choose a single mother with a stay-at-home grandmother.
There is “chemistry” in selecting an adoptive family, things no one can predict. And, if making a decision is troubling, we can help you, the birthparent, sort through your preferences, inform you of our recommendation and why, and match your child.
Some of our waiting families prefer to be on a secure page. Please call us and we will send you the password. Let us know if you have any questions!
